Monday, August 8, 2011

Summer of the coon

If you like raccoons do not read this post....

2 weeks ago we found raccoons living in our crawl space beneath our house. How did we find this out? We saw them in our vents! (WARNING - DREW IS NOW TELLING THE STORY - SLIGHT EMBELLISHMENTS WILL OCCUR) It was Saturday morning, I (Drew) was in the bathroom, perfectly positioned on the commode. I heard a noise, I saw a nose, then two eyes looking up at me through the vent cover. I screamed, not because I saw a raccoon but because I felt violated. I quickly pulled up my pants and called the critter what it was - a pervert. To make a very long story short... I checked out the crawl space and found traces of raccoon poop and shredded insulation all over. I found the peeping tom hiding in a corner, approached quickly, performed a Samoan war chant, and broke his neck Jackie Chan style. Okay, okay, I ran inside, went and bought a cage, and caught the sucker three days later.

Now this is where it gets interesting. Our friend Ramsey (prefers "Ramses" said in a spanish accent) came over to take care of the raccoon. Spoiler alert - he takes the raccoon away and shoots it - so hard! Well, Ramses and his dental school cohorts disposed of #1 but when they came back they found another one in the trash can. So for the next 1.5 hours the guys tried to figure out a way to get the raccoon out of the trash so they could kill it. It was hilarious- raccoons are feisty and extremely loud when they feel threatened. (Things to notice in the picture - (1) Shawn's face, the trash smelled real bad; (2) Ramses wielding a tee-ball bat; (3) the heads of my curious sons; (4) Shawn's use of a make-shift snare made of a broom handle and yarn; and (5) my absence, I was outside but I was 20 feet away with a gun (a nerf gun) making statements like "fellas, can you hurry up?! the mosquitos are really bothering me.")Don't worry though, we caught #2 and humanely took care of him. (Mac and Gray were removed from the window for that part). On Saturday night, #3 found her way into the cage and met a similar fate. The trap is back in the crawl space waiting for #4.

The best news about the whole thing is that after several days of having some issues, I can now peacefully enjoy my morning routine again.